When God says, "Now look what I can do"

It was a very merry Christmas to see this big smiling cowboy ride his wild little pony. Noah is a gift from God that has brought countless smiles to my face and i love him more than words can say. There's nothin like hearing this little guy coming down the hallway lookin' for trouble, he is soOOooOO funny and i know there's a lot more of that in the days to come. i can't wait for things to work out for us to be together all the time. Patience wasn't on my list when Terrie and I met but we are now both waiting for God to show us His Will for our lives.

i'm still working 3 jobs in rome, ga which is approx 320 miles north of where my heart is but i know in time all things will come together. i enjoy getting to work with enoch at winshape and have found it to be a place where God is mending my heart. i've been a broken person for quite some time now and really don't know how it all came to be but God is an all-knowing God and nothing gets by Him. He still loves me and is teaching me to love myself again. it just takes time but i'm getting there. i'm comfortable delivering pizza for papa johns and do a pretty good job but it's taking a toll on my truck and it's also teaching me how to be a better driver ;-) i've also started a paint job at first baptist church in lindale along with some other yards that i take care of, yeah i've got myself a full plate. i know its too many hours to work a week but i'm trusting that this is only temporary. i just take it one day at a time and i'm waiting to hear God say, "now look what I can do".

Good things come to those who wait

we've all heard that patience is a virtue and with a life full of experiences i've learned that this virtue will grow thru endurance of trials. it's when we are tested that we find out what we are made of. (i know, i just ended a sentence with a prepositional phrase ;-)  anyways, i know that with the calling of God comes great responsiblity and i also know that when we are faced with a mountain that we cannot climb, God says, "now let me show you what i can do". the two things i've always wanted most in life is to serve God and to be loved. God is gracious and forgiving; He has never let me down and has an amazing talent of turning my life around when it seems i'm drowning (II Sam 22 which is btw my favorite scripture passage). God has not only forgiven me for where i have fallen but He has a plan. He says in II Sam 22:10 "He bowed the heavens and came down; and darkness was under his feet." then in verse 17 he says, "He sent from above, he took me; he drew me out of many waters;" and in verse 22 "...he delivered me, because he delighted in me". God promised me a long time ago that He would bless me with greater blessing than i have ever seen and i have seen some great outpourings of God.

i am grateful to have people that love me and still love me. Terrie and I were not very patient to begin with but for the past year we have rededicated our lives to the Lord to live right and follow Him. It has been unbearable at times to be apart but God is faithful to bring good things to those who wait. Isaiah 30:18 says that "blessed are all they that wait for him." We are praying about God's plan for our lives and I know that when God's time is right, we can be a happy family that can serve God together.

a little hard work...

a little hard work never hurt anybody... my dad never really said it but by example, he taught me how to be work like a man fighten fire. as long as i can remember, my dad worked at two jobs. i'm trying to get my feet on the ground, spiritually and financially. God has my feet on the rock of ages and i'm doin' pretty good there but between working with Enoch, Papa Johns, and some side work i'm puttin' in about 90 hours a week for now but i know God has a plan where i'll be able see my little boy and watch him grow up.

sometimes we think we can do it all ourselves but i know from experience that all my efforts are futile without God at the helm of my life. i love working with Enoch and getting to spend time with him. he a real worker and yet he's still that funny Enoch we have always known... the other day, walkin' out of the dining hall, he busted out a little boody dancin' and singin' a few lines "dang girl, how'd you get all that... in them jeans, in them jeans, how'd you get all that... in them jeans, in them jeans"... i laughed the rest of the day about how funny he can be.

when i least expect it, he'll come by and pat me on the back and give me a hug while we're cuttin' grass or blowin' off the roads. Sam and Enoch bought a house and are moving this week... they are so excited and i am so proud of both of them.

last week i drove down to see Terrie and Noah for Thanksgiving. i was on cloud nine to have them little hands reaching up for me to pick him up. God knows how to bless us beyond our imagination if we'll just be patient and let Him lead us instead of getting ahead of Him. Terrie and I decided several months ago to seek God's will and wait on Him to direct our future decisions. We both know that God has a plan and we're waiting for Him this time.

it was good to spend a couple of days in MS to see my mom and my sister. Chris and Maria came with their boys (five wonderful grandsons!) i can't explain how good it made me feel to hug my oldest son and see how great a dad he has become. i'm hoping to make a trip to TX in a few weeks to spend Christmas at Chris and Maria's house.

Allowing God to work in my life

for some of us its very hard to allow God to do a work in our lives. i find myself trying to do and fix everything myself only to find myself overworked, underpaid, and frazzled. God is not going to help us until we understand that we cannot succeed on our own. we must recognize that we need Him before He is going to step onto the scene and began that glorious work that He desires to do in our lives. its a point where we must become submissive and completely trust Him. i look at my circumstances and see only chaos and uncertainty but if i will allow myself to look back at all the times that God has delivered me maybe i can look at my circumstances thru the eyes of the Lord and understand that its just a matter of time before my mountain will move before my eyes. there are several mountains in my path but i am determined to hold on to God's hand and climb over every rock to get into the presence of God. the enemy has been after me for a long time and for the past few years he has managed to seperate me from the ministry of God. i love my family and i love serving God. i cannot repair the damages that i have done and with this truth, the devil has kept me imprisoned long enough. God has been waiting for me to accept my inability of the things i cannot do so that He can perform a miracle in my life and in the lives of those i love.

Papa Jeff is working at Papa Johns

ok, after not having a job for several months, i'm now working two jobs. i work with Enoch at Winshape during the day and at Papa Johns in the evenings. last night i worked from 5pm til 2am. but its really not hard work. i deliver most of the time but at times i help out making the pizzas while waiting for my turn to come up to deliver.

noah turned 1 year old last week and it was good to be able to go down and see terrie and noah. i love them both and praying for God to protect them and bless them while we are apart. i'm searching for God will for my life and know that if I can stay in His presence long enough, that He will reveal what He wants me to do.

it's been good for me to be able to work with Enoch at Winshape. I am impressed everyday to see how he has matured into a respectable Christian man of leadership. he'll never know what it has done for me to be able to laugh with him and hug on him.

i talk to chris almost everyday and they will be having their new baby (Beniah) any day now. i will get to see Chris and his family when i go to my mom's for thanksgiving. he has been a wonderful daddy to all of his boys and makes me so proud to be his dad. he has dedicated his life to the Lord and encourages me in the Lord all the time. i love ya buddy...

Steps of a good man

today was another step for me on the path to God's Will. i accepted a job working with Enoch at WinShape Retreat which is located at Berry College in Rome, GA. God has prompted me to live by faith and with doing that i'm trusting Him to take care of me and the ones i love.  i know if i can faithful in the small things that God will bring greater things into my life. He has a plan for me to be truly happy and successful again. i feel clean again and thank God for his forgiveness everyday. the devil has been after me for a long time and for a season has kept me inprisoned, but i am no longer in that prison. Psalm  18, God heard my cry, He bowed the heavens and came down, God has rescued me from the enemy's lies that told me i was not a good man. i am a good man, but, just a man. we have all fallen short of the Glory of God, but God's Grace is sufficient and He loves me just as though i have never sinned. i am on a path to complete healing and for now i am feeling better about my life and learning to forgive myself for the steps my feet have trodden.

Psalm  37:23 "The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord; and he delighteth in his way.

One step at a time

I've been praying and reading my bible and walking with the Lord everyday. I asked Him everyday what He wants me to do and that's the way it should be. We are suppost to allow the Lord to guide us and to keep our eyes on Him. It's when our attention is taken off of Him that we lose our way. I've heard it said if we want to make God laugh, tell him our plans. Our plans are almost never the same as what His plans are for us. He has so much more for us than we can imagine. No matter how bad we mess things up, God can make a way when there seems to be no way. I know God has forgiven me for where i have made my mistakes and i thank Him everyday for the gift of salvation and for His forgiveness. With God's help, He can and will restore that which has been lost. I am thankful to be a child of God.

God Opens the Door

If we can listen to God and follow Him, He will open the doors that will allow us to walk into His Presence and His Will. It was a hard decision to drive away from AL knowing I had a precious little boy and a beautiful woman that loves me dearly. Following God will sometimes cause you pain but He knows what He is doing. I know He has a plan for me, Terrie, and Noah but this time i'm waiting on Him to show me what He wants me to do. During the last few months of 2007, I mentally broke down and made decisions based on what I was feeling instead of what God wanted. God loves me, forgave me and has been patient with me. I am determined to know His Will and to do that, I know I have to stay in His presence. A preacher once told me how to find God's Will. He said that we are not to search for His Will but to search for God. If we can find God and stay close to Him, God will reveal His Will to us. I have enjoyed being a parent as much as anything i have ever done. Noah will be 11 months old tomorrow and i talk to Him everyday. I will be going to see him next week and i can hardly wait. We've got a bunch of wrestling matches to catch up on and i know we are going to be glued together while i'm there. Let me tell ya how good God is... a man who saw one of the yards i cut asked for my name. i later called him and he said he is retiring from mowing grass and wanted to know if i was interested in several of his accounts??? WOW! i don't know what God has for me, but for know, He's opened the door for me to work outside and i'm enjoying it.

When i wake up in the mornings, i grab my water bottle and try to replenish my water supply. then i wash my face and brush my teeth. after a set or two of pushups, i slip on my running shoes and head out the door for a walk/jog around the block 1 or 2 times depending on how it feels. when it feels good, i just keep on running ;-) (Forrest Gump) anyways, after my run, i cook up a good breakfast (usually make scattered hash browns, eggs with hot peppers, topped with cheese and real sliced turkey (not the sodium saturated packaged kind). i sit at my table looking at pictures of Noah & Terrie while i eat my breakfast. after eating i open up the freezer at take out my cold glass and fill it with orange juice (oh yeah, it's goood!) then i clean up my dishes and take my vitamins.

Noah is a Gift from God

Terrie and Noah are on my mind day and night. They are both beautiful and shine like the sun. We love our little boy and want to be the best parents we can be for him. It's amazing how God can make something so beautiful. Terrie and Noah live in Grove Hill, AL and I live in Rome, GA. We are both praying for God's will in our lives.

God's Presence

Yesterday was my first Sunday back at SPWC. It was nothing less than amazing to be in the presence of God. My spirit was lifted and for the first time in a long time, i felt clean. Everyone just loved me and welcomed me back without asking any personal questions. Summerville has always been a place for me to get healing. This is not the first time that God has rescued me from the valley.

Getting Back Up

It feels good to be able to talk to God and lay down at night knowing I'm right with Him. I've made my share of mistakes and He is always faithful to forgive us. Forgiving myself has been a long time coming but I'm feeling much better about myself and getting back up. I've recently moved back to Rome, GA and renting an apartment. Actually, God has opened the door for me to start my own lawn care business. I'm planning own going to see an old friend tomorrow (bro andy) and also going to "trade day" to find a little somin somin for my birthday. I'll be 46 tomorrow ;-)